Elementary school teachers = HEROES

Boy Terror is now officially done grade 3, and Girl Terror is headed into grade 6.  I feel old.  But mostly, I feel grateful for their teachers.

Mr. Super Teacher has been Boy Terror's hero this year.  He took the class canoeing.  He played with them, taught them all the important stuff, and put up with an amazing level of crazy.  Mr. ST took the entire class canoeing.  CANOEING.  On the WATER.  Picture yourself on a beautiful summer day, floating in the calm water.  Your canoe rocks gently.  The birds are singing.  The sun is shining.  Ahhhhh.  Now toss twenty nine-year-olds at your head.  Fun!!!  Entertain them!  Feed them!  Don't let them drown!!!  Two days after the canoeing, the class went on an overnight camping trip.  I did not go.  You couldn't pay me enough to do that.  They went swimming, hiking, and pond exploring.  They ate and played and slept (Ha!  They did not sleep!) in tents.  For those of you not in the education system, let me make this clear.  Mr. ST was not paid for this overtime.  He was not required to do it.  He chose to organize and participate these trips, because he genuinely loves his job and his students.  Also, I think he might be slightly insane.  Seriously.  The man does a head check for lice on 20 wiggly children regularly.  He deals with small boys, who have just discovered the joys of "writing in the snow" with pee, and girls who are prone to crying every time someone sits in the "wrong" seat.  He blows noses, cleans up puke, listens to butt jokes, and still manages to teach my son to breathe deeply when his indoor shoes go missing (not missing.  Just moved 6 inches to the left).  In between all that, he covers the curriculum in such a fabulous way that the kids have no idea they are learning.  Boy Terror is full of interesting information and knowledge, and Mr. ST is the reason.  

If you were hired as a babysitter for $10/hour, and only got paid for 5 hours of time, you would make $50/day.  Multiply that by 20 kids, and you would get  $1000/day.  ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS.  Every day.  Mr. ST does not make that kind of money, I assure you.  But not only did he look after my child all day, he gave him the skills to solve that math problem, in his head.  Thank you, Mr. Super Teacher, for everything!

Just a quick note to share some good news

This is the amazingly wonderful work that can happen when people are willing to talk about depression.  I'm very proud of my uncle!!

Roy's Dream

Deep ramblings on a Sunday morning.

I've been talking with my Mom for a few weeks about life, my upbringing, and how the past decisions look from 40 years down the road.  She's been struggling with feeling guilty about giving me up for adoption, and I've been trying to explain how or why I have never blamed her.  This morning in the shower, it all clicked in my head.
My past, my childhood, my upbringing has created me.  I am a stronger person than I ever really thought I could be.  But the big "aha!" today is this.
I can look a student in the eye and say "I know.  I've been there.  I've lived your life, and I survived.  I am a happy, well adjusted grown-up, and you will be too."  They have to believe me because I share my life openly in the classroom.  I'm not talking from a book.  I'm not preaching from a lesson.  I tell them my life, my experiences, and how I feel looking back.
When a student says to me "My parents won't let me shower more than twice a week, and the other kids are making fun of me." I can hug them and tell them about the girls who left shampoo in my locker, and the teacher who checked me for lice every week in front of the class.  When a student mentions that her family thinks she's going to hell for being friends with a gay guy, I can talk to them about the day my dad told my younger sister that maybe her desire to be a guy was caused by demon possession.
If I didn't have my past life, if I hadn't been raised the way I was, I would be a completely different person.  Not necessarily a bad person, or even a better person, but a different one to be sure.  Right now, in this place, my students need ME.  They need the Me with My Past.  This is why I AM.

The best weekend ever.

Last weekend I was lucky enough to be part of the first National GSA Summit, in Toronto.  It was beyond anything I could have ever imagined.  Life-changing.  Awesome.  Incredible.  Overwhelming.  I honestly do not have the words to describe those four days.  I was lucky to be chaperoning an awesome group of kids, and my heart just about exploded out of my chest when they accepted the award for CSSN TD Award for Excellence Against LGBTQ Youth Bullying. Over 30 groups across Canada were nominated for this award, and THEY WON!!! They spoke eloquently, wisely, compassionately.
Rather than ramble on, flitting from thought to thought, I decided to just give the highlights from the trip.
-when we pulled in to the hotel, past the crowds of LGBTQ students and allies, one of the students said "Wow....I'm not the gayest person here!" and he was right.  For possibly the first time in his life, he was NOT the most flamboyant person in sight.  Not by a long shot.
-At the opening night concert, my students made friends.  They went out, the met, they mingled, and they totally opened themselves up.  By the end of the evening I was seeing a difference in their body language.  They stood straight.  They STRODE into the world, rather than shuffle.  Their faces started to glow.
-At breakfast the first day, one of the shyest students in my group introduced herself to all the strangers at the table.  Then she introduced me.  Then she asked questions, smiled, laughed, and made friends.  It looked effortless, and in that moment I decided to learn from her, and open myself up to meeting new awesome people.
-Queer Prom.  If you ever want to go to the best, most awesome party, make it a queer prom.  The students were encouraged to be themselves, and to dress in any way that made them comfortable.  They danced, they laughed, they got prom pictures taken.  They danced some more.  The music never stopped, and the kids poured their energy out onto that dance floor.  Youth who normally sit off to the sides, watching, were up on the floor dancing, singing and clapping.  The feeling of acceptance was overwhelming.  I saw a first kiss.  I complimented a hot guy on his dress....very Alice in Wonderland.
-Sunday afternoon we sat on the lawn with Ivan Coyote.  Ivan graduated from our school, and went on to become an award winning author and a hero to many.  Seriously, go read one of their books.  Ivan was there to present our award, and we were lucky enough to get time to sit down together as a group ahead of time.  The kids totally opened up to Ivan, and I felt so lucky to be included in the conversation.  Ivan described our high school the way it was in the late '80s.  We got to share the ways things have improved, and the ways things are still really, really sucky.  I cried, they cried, Ivan cried.  We talked about the award, and what it meant.
-Before leaving the conference, we had to say goodbye.  It was heart wrenching, and beautiful all at the same time.  We were all changed, and it felt amazing, but at the same time we all knew that going back to the "real world" was going to be really, really hard.  Possibly painful.  Friends promised to stay in touch forever.  Emails and phone numbers were shared.  Hugs, tears and words of strength and encouragement flowed.
Here are some of the words I heard and stored in my heart throughout the weekend:
"Your students are some of the most polite and friendly kids I've ever met!" (from another educator)
"I held hands with a girl today....and nobody even blinked!"
"If school was this accepting, I'd go every day."
"If we can do all this, imagine what we will do in the next two years!!" (the next summit is in two years)
And a conversation I overheard in the elevator:
Person 1:  "I just met the coolest person, and they are going to add me on facebook!"
Person 2:  "Cool.  Guy?  or girl?"
Person 1:  "Ummmm.....no idea.  I didn't think to ask."
Person 2:  "Doesn't really matter."

And that sums it up.  Doesn't really matter.  Guy, girl, or undetermined.  Straight, gay, or any variation thereof.  Does not really matter.  Awesome is not a gender, and fantastic is not a sexual orientation.  They just ARE.

My mother, my hero

Student Teacher just gave the class an assignment:  Write a poem or story in honour of a family member who you would like to thank.

My mother was not there when my first tooth fell out
when I got braces
or when I had my wisdom teeth removed.
My mother did not see me graduate from kindergarten
high school
or university.
My mother did not get to tuck me in
wake me up
or worry when I missed curfew.

My mother made the ultimate sacrifice
for me
so my life could be better.
She gave me all the chances
and possibilities
her life could not offer.

Now, my mother is my best friend.
She knows my beliefs
my thoughts
my heart.
My mother is someone
I share my tears
my laughter
my worries with.

She is the strongest
the bravest
the most fearless
Mother.
She is my mom, and I will forever
keep her in my heart.

Student teacher is teaching me to watch and listen. She has a tough job.

I have a student teacher for the next 5 weeks.  This is a new experience for me, which is always awesome!  I hope to learn from watching someone else interact with my students, and hopefully pick up some tips.  I remember my practicum, and it was a huge eye-opener into the world of daily teacher life.  It made me sooo excited to get into my own classroom.
So far, I've discovered that I am a control freak.  I might have issues.  I'm possessive, and controlling, and uptight.  Did I mention the control thing??  Oh my god.  I'm giving up control, and it hurts hurts hurts.  I'm bossy, and I want to leap up and take control.  Obviously I haven't done that, since it would be defeating the entire point.  Poor student teacher would have to go back to university and say "I wanted to teach the class.  I really did.  But the Teacher kept interrupting and taking over, and totally ruined my lesson plans."  The other student teachers would feel sad for her, and my name would be written in some secret book of "Horrible Mentor Teachers - Avoid!!"
I might have to find a way to sit on my hands, and tape my mouth shut.  She's doing a fantastic job, and it will be a good lesson to me to learn to shut up and listen.  But.....it's just so haaaarrrrrdddddd!!

Catching up

I know, I know, I suck.  It's just that life has not been very exciting, so I had nothing to write about!  Also, I am lazy.  Very lazy.

The bake sale was a huge success!  We raised $450 and got a picture on the front page of the local paper.  Don't get too excited....ravens regularly get on the front page, as do random clouds, snow drifts, and rivers.

I haven't talked about Boy Terror lately, but he's doing great.  GREAT!  There was a fire alarm at his school yesterday, and even though he was mid-poop, and very surprised by the alarm, he dealt with it in a calm manner.  No panic, no tears, and no melt-down.  Very exciting!  Last night he was invited to a friend's place for an after school play date.  This is thrilling to us as parents, because we were both social disasters growing up, and we were afraid our little introvert might never have friends.  They played video games, and ran wild, and had a blast!  Woo hoo!  Hubby pointed out that it was a bit weird for Boy Terror to go play with this particular child, since HIS father used to game with Hubby!  Back in the day, they worked at Pizza Hut together, and sat in dark basements playing role playing games that made their mothers cringe.  Oh, the joys of a small town.  Everyone knows your name, your employment history, your relationship stories, and can recite the tale of the one time you did something stupid.